The silence is golden.....: "What a lesson, at 5 years old"

"What a lesson, at 5 years old" 22.8.07

I'll never forget the day and how it's influenced my whole life from there onwards and I was just a little 5 year old lad who was put on the spot and acted with an old head in a split second.

So what am I going on about now? ;o)

It was a lovely day, we were all at school sitting in the hall for assembly, I gazed out of the floor to ceiling windows over looking the outdoor swimming pool, watching the shimmer of the sun on the water made me feel good.

I felt like I was anywhere but where I was until the headmaster stood on the stage and addressed us all, his voice snapped me out of my trance and I turned to face him.

"Good morning everyone" he said, "we have a special guest today who wants to talk to you all, so please welcome to the stage... (forgot the name?!) " as he motioned over to the man with his arm.

The man stepped up and slowly started to speak to us all while scanning over us kids "hello everyone, I am from the Royal National Institution for the Deaf, RNID for short and I believe there is a deaf child here today?"

"Dam" I thought... everyone turning to look at me, the man spotted me and ask me if I would like to stand up...to myself I thought, NO not really but slowly rose to my feet felling a little embarrassed..."yes sir" I said, I noticed the surprised look on his face.

"Ok nice to meet you and what's your name?" he asked...

"Rob" I aid sheepishly, wishing I could sit down and let him get on with it.

"Great well Rob, I am here today to help you as well as others with something I think you may find makes things easier for you" as he held his hands up and signed to me "hello Rob"...

I must have looked perplexed because he then asked me if I knew of any signing at all, when I shook my head he asked if I would like to try some and everyone else could try it too.

"No thanks" I said...

Shocked he ask me "do you feel uncomfortable about it or is there any reason as to why you don't want to?"

"No I don't need it, I can talk and if I start to learn that then everyone else has to as well, but if I talk only I have to learn it" was my reply, where this thought come from I had no idea.

"Well that's ok, we can all just try the very basics, the letters" as he held his hand up to show the vowels being signed, "you can all try this" he went on...

I sat sharpish...he noticed and thanked me for talking to him.

We all started to do the signing, myself very reluctantly as I felt singled out for this.

That man was not on that stage as long as he hoped, after the assembly the headmaster called me to his office, by now I thought I was going to be told off.

As I entered the office I saw the man also there sat with a bemused look on his face, "your speech is great Rob" he said, I thanked him, looked towards the headmaster in anticipation of a "telling off" which never came...

"Rob, I am proud of you, you showed an old head on your shoulders and everything will be done to help you continue the way you are, well done."

I was pleased to not get the telling off and not have to learn to sign.

I asked him to explain what he meant by old head on my shoulders! ;o)

"Two things happened today" he said, "one, YOU made the decision that will shape your life and two, you gained something from your friends that no-one else could have done, that is... understanding".

The man put his hand out for me to shake it and thanked me and wished me good luck...I shook it feeling like I had achieved something for me.

The very next day I noticed all of my friends were looking at me alot more when talking to me which helped me lipread them better.

It was not till years later I realised the significance of that day and exactly what the headmaster meant by that "understanding".

By me taking that stand and saying "if I have to learn that everyone else will have to too"
I saved all my friends some learning curve they wouldn't have wanted and THAT meant they knew without really realising it that they owed it to me to try harder with me.

And they did, they did ME proud...they helped me become who I am.
They helped me become part of the "hearing world".

THANKS to all of them and I know some read this blog, they may even remember that day. ;o)

That day will never leave me. :o)

Amazing how switched on we are as kids without even knowing it.

Any thoughts?

Labels: deaf, deafness, life, personal

posted by Rob Sellen @ 10:49 PM,

9 Comments:

At 7:42 AM, fgaughan said...: Read with interest,also I am Deaf like you Rob.

Do we really need the RNId?
Do we really need them to come to the school and do a speech when the school can do that them selves?

Do we really need the RNId to give them selves pay rises and bonuses on the back of our disability?

What else have they done for you Rob other than creating a PR machine and making themselves look good?

Are we not capable of looking after our interest?

I am not having a go at you Rob just giving you some thoughts on why some of us want the RNID either take on more *Deaf* staff who knows what they are talking about.

If you go to the RNId headquarters today, I can bet that non of the staff can sign
At 10:20 AM, Rob :-) said...: I agree... thats why I am NOT a member. ;o)

I said the same on their forum a few years ago.. hence me not going there anymore. ;o)

They have a small ratio of deaf workers and it stinks to be honest.
At 7:51 PM, bs angel said...: That's a great story. Definitely the best thing I have read today.

I never would have thought of the aspect you did. Such an amazing observation for a young child.
At 10:03 PM, Ginger said...: Cool story. You seem to be blogging pretty well - for a guy (allusion to previous post, hehe). Stumbled you after getting here from a Blog Catalogue thread.
At 10:05 PM, Rob :-) said...: Thanks Ginger...maybe it's my "feminine" side coming to the fore. ;o)
At 1:14 AM, Stacey063 said...: I really liked your story and look forward to reading more from you. My aunt is deaf but lives far from us and we've only had occasional visiting due to the distance.I'm very interested in your take on all things!
At 4:06 PM, Jayne said...: Great story! Found you on StumbleUpon and have enjoyed your blog!

Will definitely read more.

~J
At 5:40 PM, Cindy said...: Very nice post. To say what you did at five years old was extremely wise and brave!

Cindy

http://beethovensears.com
At 8:20 PM, Blogger Gabby said...: Rob, this post was the best that appealed to me out of the 3 that i read on coming here.
I like your sense of humor overall, also referring to the other posts and the page. In fact I did not understand the page title when i first came in here.
Now I do.
Cheers!