Barriers, break em down, change the rules…

I’ve been giving some thought to why we do certain things, even in a certain way, why some things seem hard to do, some seem so easy, what input do we actually put into it rather than it being like second nature, why do we still do certain things that are not really good or productive when we already know it’s not.

How easy we can pick up a habit even without the intention.

We grow up with all these narrow beliefs, ideals, goals, fears, barriers imposed forced onto us, in and out of the home, by everyone we encounter, friends, family, teachers, strangers and peers.

Changing these is no mean feat, lifelong held habits, fears and traits are going to be hard to break, for anyone.

That’s my aim, break my own bad habits, quash any notion that doesn’t resonate with me.

Life’s not easy and it’s not made any easier by the way society moulds you, not to say everyone is bad, more accurate would be to say… structured moulding to benefit “some other” rather than yourself, it’s also limiting in most cases to what yourself truly has to offer.

A big reason “self help” and “self improvement” is such an active area, self education really only happens when you are an adult and it’s by choice.

Mindset is everything, as they say, sadly though…

Most don’t bother, saying it’s all “namby pamby crap” and the like… self education is not confined to “self improvement books” ~ not by a long shot.

Even though it is probably the most important education we have…it’s not forced, like school… which is the whole reason school works as it does, they gotta do it!

It shapes us so well for the end means.

You know the score, be a good boy/girl, do as you’re told, go to school, get good grades, work all you life to make someone rich, pay taxes for governments to waste, have a child for the next batch of people moulding, die…. and so on!

Living by the rules of others.

The rules need changing making up as you go along.

That’s not to say, you should just do as you please, break the law, anything like it… that’s daft.

I am saying what rules really apply to you, for example, when I was little being born deaf it was commonly presumed I’d have to learn signing, go to a “special school” and learn to “fit in”.

Well they weren’t my rules, and I had no problem “fitting in” because I never felt “out of place” in the first place.

It wasn’t a self imposed barrier. I wasn’t going to have someone else decide how I would fare.

So many barriers we tend to live with, the main ones that need to be dealt with are self imposed but as we all know… knowing a problem is the hard part, not solving it. Recognising which barriers, problems, issues are self imposed as opposed to being due outside forces is where the real focus should be, as they are the most rewarding to break, resolve.

Truth is some barriers we simply don’t see, like the one above regarding myself, they only exist in other peoples minds.

Self imposed ones we may miss, initially, but we can see them if we look at it head on and recognise it for what it is… a problem, barrier, you knowingly or unknowingly created and one you can also get over, break down.

I get reminded of this with relationships, you know some gal ya know will post “why are all men bastards” on a status somewhere, yet miss the fact they choose the men they have, they have certain relationship traits which attract a certain man…so instead of recognising it and dealing with it, they blame the men!

The fact is we all have certain relationships, rather then certain partners.

I digress… some are… so are some ladies we could as easily say!

Obviously we are not all bastards!

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2 Responses to Barriers, break em down, change the rules…

  1. jeanmarie taylor says:

    i totally agree , we are born with this clean sheet and the world and other peoples beliefs mould us so we adopt other people insecuritys and neroueses (spelling not good) my son has terrible dyslexia and also autism and we fought and struggled to keep him mainstream because he was not a naughty kid and had a zest for knowledge and i refused to have him written off as it was he went to all saints dyslexia base and is now at weymouth collage and doing really well , i live with adeep rooted feeling to keep evolving i am not happy with the coping statergies i have adopted i think a person that can look at there shortcommings or failures and make changes hold your hand up and say i need to make changes should be encouraged i make lots of mistakes and worry about other peoples feelings more than my own dosnt make me a better person in fact the opposite i have a book shelf full of books the worry cure , who moved my cheese all self help books and they help i also believe in angels and love doing my orale cards because it makes u take time out and focus on something that u may need to know it dosnt hurt anyone and helps me , we all need help just got into the habbit of it being weak to ask we can change our thoughts our parents and grandparents and teachers etc wernt always right and we can challenge wot they taught us this dosnt have to mean we are being disrispectful we grow physcicallybut we need to grow mentaly too thanks rob lots to think about .xx

  2. Rob says:

    Who moved my cheese.. I have that book too, I was sent it by a friend, and now lent to a friend. ;o)

    So glad to hear your son is doing so well.
    We are amazing resilient things when young.

    Thanks for sharing that with us.

    Rob

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