Need to start taking more photos, getting a bit of a withdraw symptoms … 😉
But I wanted to share something, something I felt worth a post, I’m sure many know of this kind of thing at some point.
I have seen a couple of examples of this lately myself… plenty of others in the past too.
Influence, we all use it, get swayed by it, and we all look to it too. Influence of many forms for many reasons. Good and bad… it’s a part of life, people influence people and situations all the time.
Together with leverage… creates a powerful combination.
But, more than that …
It’s also dangerous…
People are though, especially the selfish manipulative ones. It baffles me in one sense.
Isn’t it tragic how devious some people can be, lie and manipulate, I mean to go so far as to let those closest to them, even family, be influenced by it too, led along by lies and manipulation to the point of acting on it.
That alone could be a dangerous thing. It’s ok for the manipulator, they don’t get the main consequences.
These kind don’t care about the fact those close to them are acting on their lies… making those people close look as bad as them, the liar, and it always has the potential to go badly wrong.
Crazy world, odd people out there. I mean you gotta be empty of heart to let that happen. Surely? Especially with family members.
Using them in a sense. Sad…
What happens though when…. The person close learns they have been used and realises they have acted in a way that’s wrong, towards someone else, because of the manipulator?
The guilt or shame that person then feels, for acting on that bad influence. If they care.
Do the manipulators ever consider that? Unlikely else they wouldn’t do it.
Disappointing humans. . . they become in the end, what they project. . .
A false perception
People can and often do create a perception of you, it may be completely wrong, they may realise it once they know you, and see you are not as they thought, they see the real you, a good thing as normally it’s a worse perception they started with. 😉
No need to be anything other than yourself. 😉
Some can be worse than what others first perceive them to be… oh yeah… manipulative ones can project something better, always… problem is it never last. It’s false.
If these manipulative people had sense, they would not need to make it harder for themselves, creating something they don’t really want, long term, a false self with no substance. A fake. . .
Be the real you.
I mean … instead…
These manipulative people create a false perception in the others head, yet, that perception eventually becomes more real because the manipulator has to try to live up to it.
Even creating more lies in order to do it or to keep that false perception in the others head. But it’s always only temporary …
Like liars tell more lies to cover the previous lies, eventually they believe their own lies… and everyone else eventually knows they are a liar. They changed that perception for everyone and then moan when no one believes them, because of the same perception the manipulative one created. 😉
What makes a person do things they know will only backfire on them in the long run like that?
We all know how long a false perception will really last, it will, like lies, eventually crumble to pieces around them. Flaky people create flakes.
Why would anyone want to create a false perception in those heads of the ones close to them, a perception they know cannot last, or ever really be seen as real?
Even if it does help the manipulators games at the time, they are short lived, always.
Stupid maybe? Short odds that, be lucky to get evens. 😉
I think they are stupid enough to believe everyone else is as stupid as they are. 😉 …
Like a dog does!
Inflated perception of their own intelligence more like. 😉
It’s a dangerous thing, thinking we are smarter than we really are, can trip people up in all sorts of ways, more so when these people consider others to be beneath them, thick, too stupid to not fall for their crap.
If you suspect someone close is doing this kind of thing… Take the emotion out of it, imagine it was someone else doing the same thing… then see it for what it is. Would you fall for it then?
Problem is, because of this, plenty will fall for things like that, not because they are stupid, but mainly because they find it hard to see someone close as being anything other than what they do, usually it’s an overly biased view.
Sadly, that leads to a bigger fall for them and the manipulator once truth outs. As it always does.
I know I am not the smartest person in the world, never will be, but I also know I am not thick… certainly not stupid enough to fall for the things these people do, the way they do it.
What they forget is I have to read body language as much as faces and lips, being deaf… so you know, I spot what they don’t realise, I can’t help it, I grew up like it, the funny thing is they can’t help exposing their lies and deviousness… as the body doesn’t lie. It can’t.
Actions speak louder than words
This is your true way of measuring someone, anyone. . .everytime, no matter what it is, their actions will tell more truth than their words ever could.
Don’t listen to what they say, watch what they do…
You then soon see the reality. Although…
People like this can be clever in what they do, but usually only to those new to them, or very close to them. Time reveals the truth as everyone like that will slip up, somewhere, somehow.
True colours always show. The sooner the better. 😉
Not many are stupid enough to be fooled for long.
Usually people say they won’t do such and such, and later you find out they did exactly that… the fact they lied matters not to them, they are only a little bothered they got caught out, not much, because they know it’s now done, nothing they can do to change it and it helped them in their little game at the time. They see it as a win.
They didn’t care enough in the first place else they wouldn’t do it. 😉
They shrug it off… and will often lie saying it was a one off. Never believe that…
As they say, once a liar always a liar, once a cheat, always a cheat… and so on. 😉
Call them out on it
Nothing will have more influence in changing them than that IF they do want to change… not likely as most won’t face the reality and think more long term, even if it does benefit them and those close to them to do so.
Everyone can change… Not everyone wants to, sadly.
But, if you have been used this way, it’s someone close, a family member for example, because you love them you will be honest and tell them, so at least they know you know, then they will think twice next time, that’s a change right there, even if it is only with you.
If they don’t like it when you call them out, they don’t change, they are still less likely to try it on next time with you, a positive.
Narcissist people though, hate to be called out on it and will never change … best to just tell them, and walk, fast because they will blow their top, rather than hope they change. Just tell them so they know you know.
Then walk or minimise your actions with them, so they are unable to influence you, the way they want to.
Call them out on it everytime. (Unless a narcissist) … Eventually they have to face the truth, that they really are as they are… at least with you. You point out how many times you called them out, most of them can count at least. 😆
Give them a chance then let it go
You never know, some may well change, or want to, they may even go as far as apologising and then showing by their actions they really meant it.
Great, if so… then really. That’s great, you may not trust them for a long while yet, or 100% ever again, but they did make that effort, for that ya gotta give them credit for doing so then let it go.
I mean don’t let it become a big thing … if they are close to you, family, you want them in your life, as much as they want you in theirs, but…
Just accept that they have made efforts to change and be glad they did that and let it go, they are the ones who need to make it a bigger thing, by keeping that changed behaviour up, yes? 🙂
If on the other hand, people don’t change their ways, or even want to, don’t hold any resentment or anger, because that just harms you, let them go and let it go.
These manipulative people are not worth the emotional time or effort. I learnt this the hard way. . .
Clear the mental Cache … then move forward. 🙂
Any thoughts? Comment below…
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