Do you feel lucky?
Nor me… at times. 😉
I was inspired yesterday by Jon Morrows story, I remember him writing for the popular copyblogger site, I say write, but you need to go see his story to understand why it is so inspiring, 7 simple life lessons from him that will make you think, think again, then grab life by the nuts…
And why you should feel a
little lot luckier.
Yet… that story also got me thinking on the flip side.
Jon said… “life is going to punch you in the face”
Yeah, it sure is, and it’s gonna hurt… most hurt for a short while. Some a little longer.
Pain though… It has it’s life benefits.
Yet the worse punches are the lifelong ones…
Like Jons, even like mine… having a disability, having something to live with daily for example. Can’t change them though. No ones fault. It just is as it is.
So, you except it, get on with it, it defines life but not us, except in some other peoples minds, those too embarrassed to face up to their own shame and guilt of thinking they are better…
Trust me, they are out there. Sadly.
The reality is though, in life…
Most people don’t care
That’s a truth, I’m not saying they don’t care about you, me, or others at all, just that… well, they don’t care. In their own little bubbles.
Most care only about themselves and even then, not enough in the right way. . . way too much ego driven thought these days, selfish and made worse nowadays by so many factors I think.
Not enough self respect to care the right way. Not enough.
Not even me at times!
Here’s what I mean.
I got a mate who is always on his phone, I mean, all the time it’s glued to his ear…
So one day, we were sat in his garden and I said, “imagine not being able to answer that mate, ever” … I got a puzzled look back, a bemused “what ya mean”, well I said, “like me, I can’t ever use one of them like that” …
“Yeah, not sure I could cope with that, but yeah, I imagine you’d love to be able to use one” he said.
“Do bears poo in the woods mate?” I replied, with a smile… 😉
Then his phone rang… We looked at each other….
I said ” imagine it” … “never being able to answer it” … “or ring ya mum, or kids”
“Gotta answer it mate” and he did, just like that… and he was almost arguing with someone on there.
After his call, I looked at him, “lucky you” I said, he was a bit taken back and said “what ya mean, the idiot pissed me off”…
I carried on.. “well, there ya go, my only point is, to appreciate what you have a little more in the right way, don’t take it for granted, if you knew he was gonna piss you off, why inflict that onto your ears”
He took it for granted he could… we all do it to a point with all we can do.
He didn’t care, he just took for granted he could. So he did.
Then a bird sang… I faintly heard it, I said, “am I hearing a bird sing his little tune there” … “he looked up, and with a casual wave of his arm in the air towards them, he said “oh yeah, noisy things” … “all the damn time”
I laughed, he looked at me… I said,.. “you don’t care do you really” … he thought I meant about the birds singing.
Sigh. . . See what I mean?
He didn’t care, enough, in the right way.
People forget about it, immediately.
Even I did it today but in a different way, because I read Jon’s story, and had a crappy day of frustrations. . .
I didn’t care enough to consider things properly, put it in perspective, the fact I can do it all and I should have done it all, with a smile on my face! Simply because I could.
And the fact I had just read Jon’s story, I knew better… I didn’t care enough, I forgot… Just like everyone else does. 😉
Realising most don’t care can be something we react two ways with, either we let that bother us and it get’s us down, or not.
Look at things a little more and you see its true… most people don’t care about much outside of their own little bubble.
Expand the bubble
If some people are so wrapped up in their own little bubble to the point of being selfish, self centered, then you know, there is a problem, hard to have empathy for anything outside that bubble when all you do is look in.
The first person they should empathise with is themselves. 😉
A lack of empathy is one growing problem in this day and age, or maybe it’s just more noticeable in a different way.
I think mainstream media, films, games, news, tv, even social media all this stuff harms peoples empathy. They are desensitised to things, especially bad things and they also take on the traits of portrayals of people they see… it’s powerful in a subtle way.
Look at when you are a kid, you watch some movie like Rocky, next thing you know, you and your brothers are boxing in bedrooms and walloping each other… we all did it!
Expand that bubble and keep it that way… Better yet,.. pop it. 😉
You will notice it’s the small things that stand out, small acts of kindness and decency you see start to be noticed… a smile even.
Many people won’t simply because they lack that empathy, and many others will say you can’t change that but I don’t believe that at all.
Maybe some can’t… many can.
Takes conscience thinking, and observation. 😉
It really is up to you, go pop that bubble you are in…
Live and walk the truth
The line of empathy, decency, respect, truth and honesty will always be a smoother and stronger one than one of denial, selfishness, dishonesty…
Yet the only person you have to be honest and truthful with is yourself. Then live it.
You are the one who has to live with yourself. 😉
As I am me… 🙂
It’s all us, what we can do about us, our mindset, the way we go about things, how we treat people.
Ever realised how hard it is to forgive someone who is not even sorry?
Believe me when I say, it’s difficult, had to do that several times in a big way but the benefit of it is it weighs less on yourself. Pain hurt’s till you face it, accept it and let it move on.
It makes yourself a bigger person though. Takes courage. Big courage.
Once you do something like that, it has a profound effect as you start to realise you are living truthful to yourself. It changes you. Life becomes easier to live with.
I know many will never see their own faults, but doing it means you can change them and yourself.
I asked myself a ton of honest questions. Some I wouldn’t usually have.
Ask yourself these questions… Just a random bunch I can think of.
Do you feel good about yourself and how your life is going? They way you are, how you treat others? Are you honest to those around you?
Are you unhealthy? Are you active enough? Do you live just for yourself? Do you question yourself? 😉
Are you prone to self loathing? Thinking badly of others? Being judgmental? Or attacking others when they point out the truth?
Name calling? Hide things from people? Demand others lie for you? Disrespect people? Take your anger out on others? Talk down to people? Belittle people?
If you can be honest with yourself and you say yes to some of that, you need to live with more honesty in life, from the heart… we all can in a way.
When we lie to ourselves we make our own lives far more complicated, we only harm ourselves in many ways, like me kidding myself I am giving up smoking yet still have to have one at some point. I will only hurt me.
Dieting? Snacking on the sly, lying to yourself, harms who?
Tell lies to those close like family and eventually it causes division, trouble and strife.
Create falsehoods to avoid taking responsibility for your own behaviour?
All things that eventually harm self, as well as others.
That”s why living and walking the line of honesty and empathy will always have a stronger smoother line, less complications.
You only have to be honest to yourself, have empathy for yourself and then it spreads out of your bubble as you live it. 🙂
Don’t forget that you really can have it all, do it all, If Jon can. you can…
Surely we all want to be the best us we can be? 😉
What are you waiting for?