It’s been a week of ups and downs for me, hence I have been quiet of late which culminated on Sunday when I had a scary panic attack, the only one I have ever had and I hope I never have another one.
Having been taking a step back and looking at the bigger picture from a different perspective it dawned on me that things just aren’t good enough really, what I do and where I am going is bothering me alot, not to mention the sheer time and effort I have put into it, along with the stress I have been under.
It feels as though I am swimming against a tide, and failing at it!
Then I thought about it… who really cares?
I am not asking for sympathy, or anything of the sort, I am looking at it realistically…
I am wasting my time with certain things and have already deleted some blogs, stopped “trying” in certain areas of what I do, the niches I have tried to get somewhere with.
This last week I have been taking big action of some areas, meaning I have deleted sites, blogs, lots of crap from my pc and decided to make some big lifestyle changes.
I’m going to come straight out and say, regarding online stuff… all this effort was a total waste of time, time I don’t get back, time I should have spent doing other meaningful stuff with. I take full responsibility for wasting that time!
Yet there are people out there selling it as “easy, and anyone can do it” which I am going to tell you is utter bollox!
I talk from experience too.
Yes anyone can start a blog, making it work and keeping at it until it is a success (by way of getting back what you put in) is what they DON’T tell you about…that is the work and the hard part.
Let me ask you this…
If this blog was deleted tomorrow, who would it really impact? Me? You? My friends?
My sons? (who really matter)
This is no A list blog so it’s not likely to impact many people.
Therefore if I did delete it and start all over again and making it what I really want it to be, it’s not the end of the world..like I say, it’s not a A list blog with tens of thousands of readers every day, far from it!
Maybe you see this blog sometime and it will look different simply because I decided to bite the bullet and change it. I know what mistakes I have made and where, which means I can at least pin point what I should have done and need to do better.
I need to be alot more serious about it than I have been if I want to see big improvements, I also need to focus better, I need to narrow the focus of what I do and where.
I am in some way glad this last week was as it was for me, it gave me the kick in the arse I needed.
I certainly want to see my fantastic sons have kids, so first and foremost is to improve my health, after all what if’s not a panic attack next time, but a bloody heart attack!
A big part of that problem is stress, we all know what stress is like and how damaging in can be so I have to get that at a minimum, part of the reason I stopped doing so much this week.
I do feel more ready to face things now.
Grab the button.
Good for you!! You should put your health, happiness and family first and sometimes you need something like that to take stock of your life. It's great to see a 'bloke' being open and honest and talking from the heart. Enjoy a health and happy future Rob. x
Thanks.
)
Yeah, you are right, I have to do it.
Not very nice these panic attacks Rob. Jamie had these and he ended up at the doctors who helped him out. Taking stock of things in your lifestyle is a big move and I'm glad to see that you are taking some kind of action at last. At the end of the day YOU are number 1 in your book, your boys have to come second because if you want to see grandchildren, then YOU are the one who has to be fit and well, not only in your body, but in your mind. Stop stressing and trying to do so much, chill out more, find a new hobby and don't just sit at your computer all day. Your walkabouts and photos should help you lots, because you also get to meet people you maybe have not seen in a while and this can refresh the brain. Think on it Rob and do as you say you are going to do – act now. I wish you well xxxxx
From an outsiders point of view rob your a good bloke with a heap of good things to say and a lot of good advice to give, the items you talk about hit a note with a lot of people and this include's small thing's like the status comments you put on facebook etc..
maybe you beat yourself up too much as i can see your a sensitive person, but that's not a bad thing sometimes, as the world needs people like yourself who actually give a toss about certain issues.
I hope you keep doing what your doing as i for one will keep reading your blog's.
From experience change is hard, i hope you stick to it and find what your looking for ..
Thanks for the nice comments and kind words. I appreciate it alot.
I have got to get off the pc more and these last few days I have doing so and felt better for it, going to make lots of little changes which should amount to one big change, a better lifetsyle.
Realising you only get one shot at this.
Thanks again.
Rob, just stick to doing the stuff you enjoy doing and writing about, if you enjoy it do it if not forget it.
Thanks.
) I am starting to think…sod it write it for me more… maybe that's what I need to do.
Only one way to find out.
)